It's taken me a lot to be so open about this due to it being a really personal sensitive subject but I thought it would be a good idea to share my experiences on how I've coped with having a sibling who has learning difficulties, I also wanted to help other people understand because mental illnesses, disabilities, disorders etc are no joke and I think a lot more people need to be educated on subjects like these because they're seriously not talked about enough.
Before I start I'd just like you to be made aware that my brother was diagnosed with ADHD as well as learning difficulties. Believe it or not ADHD is classed as a disability as well as a learning difficulty and is linked to other things such as autism depression, anxiety etc.
I'd like to start off with talking about ADHD, now for anyone who doesn't know what it stands for it's an Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. It is split into two types of behavioral problems, inattentiveness and impulsiveness. My brother has symptoms from both these categories but not all of them.
Symptoms of ADHD he suffers from:
- Hyperactivity
- Difficulty in concentrating (easily distracted)
- Appearing to forget things or losing them
- Excessive talking
- Being unable to wait his turn
- Interrupts conversations
- Hates change
- No sense of danger
- Fidgeting
- Hates being rejected
- Fear of failure
- Struggles sleeping
- Unable to oragnise
Now one of the things that upsets me as a sister is that I have to watch how distressed and upset my brother becomes because of other people who don't understand or they're not aware. He's an easy target. He gets bullied. People take advantage and it's unfair. He struggles in social situations, now this is a difficult one but it's just one of them things. My brother is one of the most loveliest, friendliest caring boys you'll ever meet, he just wants to be friends with everyone. But on the other hand when people pick on him or irritate him on purpose because they know they'll get a reaction out of him he lashes out and becomes aggressive, I guess that's all just the frustration built up and he doesn't know how to deal with it. So because of this he genuinely has no friendships and it breaks both mine and my mums heart, he's not a horrible, vindictive sly child he genuinely is so lovely, he just can't help it due to the chemical inbalance in his brain.
Now one of the things that really bugs me is when people say "ADHD is not a real thing it's bad parenting, stop trying to cover it up". I'm sorry, no I'm not sorry, this is SO out of order. It is not bad parenting it's a genuine thing, it's classed as a disability. If the child is acting up with general bad behvaiour and the parents couldn't give a damn then that's a different thing. In my opinion it's so hard to tell if it's bad behaviour of if the individual has ADHD or they can even have autism etc.All the symptoms and signs are there though. I wish some people would please stop passing judgement, it's not nice.
I'll tell you a little story off subject, but when I was 8 and he was born, I remember crying because I wanted a little baby sister not a brother. But now I really would not change him for the world, I'm so protective over him because I hate seeing him so upset sometimes which leads me onto explaining how do I cope. I just do, even if he doesn't annoy me and we fall out from time to time, but that's what families and siblings do right?. I asked my mum how does she coped and she said the same. " You can't sit and mope around complaining about it because it's not going to go away, it's a lifelong thing and it's not his fault, he was born with it".
I'd just like to clear up there are options such as medication for it, but with my brother it wasn't the best course of action due to one of the effects being sudden death if they've had open heart surgery or a problem with there heart previously. So instead at school he has one on one teachers to help bring out the best of him with his school work because believe it or not he's a very very clever boy, and no this is not biased. He's a lot smarter than me if I'm being honest and he's not even a teenager yet. He just needs that little bit of extra support and there's nothing wrong with that. I am ridiculously proud of him.
Sorry for writing such a long post but there was no way of me writing a smaller amount. If you've any other questions then feel free to comment below but no nasty comments please.
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